1. Religion and Marriage: - Religion should have no say in the matters of marriage, though I do not deny the role of cultural compatibility in wedding.
Sometime back Religion was inextricably associated with Education. It is not so now. (It's another matter that now Market has taken over it. Greed has replaced Fear.) Morality, for many of us, is now based on the solid foundation of Reason and personal spirituality, and not on fear and superstition. Madarsa etc seems fossils of the bygone era, though they are still in existence. Similarly, there will be a day when people will laugh at the idea of religion and caste etc being the most important factors in matrimony.
When I say this, I want to make it very clear that I do recognize that marriage is primarily and ultimately a social institution. But that doesn't make it a religious ritual in which individuals have to be sacrificed at the altar of meaningless traditions.
Same holds true for caste. In connection with this topic, I have three points to make here.
First, culture and religion are not the same, as commonly supposed. Religious difference/similarity is not necessarily cultural difference/similarly. These two are two different things with nothing much in common.
Second, even the issue of cultural incompatibility must not be used as an excuse to curtail the freedom of adults. Modern times are all about more freedom and more responsibility for man and woman. Moreover, it is possible for two individuals from different religious and cultural backgrounds to strike a harmony at personal level, which transcends all these man-made barriers. It is for them to decide and it is for them to bear the consequences of their decisions. They have right to make a second best decision as well, as long as they don't harm others. Others must not poke their noses in their personal affairs.
Third, the real challenge is not ideological rigor-mortis or intellectual inertia, though nobody can ignore their presence around us, and the formidable frequency with which they present themselves to us. Reason has been made a mere agent of selfishness, a mere alibi to protect the status quo of the satisfied. The real challenge, which beats out the best of thinkers, is social pressure. And for financially and politically potent individuals, this pressure works at an emotional level - the mothers start crying and the fathers stop to talk. We usually succumb to it, and one more generation is sacrificed to perpetuate the traditional nonsense. How do we fight society in its ugliest restrictive form? We can not unless we understand it, and most of us can not. Who is society? How does it look like? Everyone swears by it and no one can see it or show it. But we have to see it, and also see how it works, in order to defeat it. To me, it's clear that this invisible system thrives on our collective ignorance and fear. And its only antithesis is truth and courage. Now can you see why society discourages both? :)
2. The villain inside: - Our mind is like a software that has been installed in our brain. This software has been designed (again, by society, and its powerful Agent Smiths) to control us and rule us through the maxims of the forgotten childhood memories, which primarily involves emotions like fear, guilt and shame. We see what is shown to us and we say what we hear from our surroundings. Original thinking is often a delusion. We think that we are thinking but we hardly ever do that. Doing 2 + 2 = 4 is no thinking. Excuse me for repeating The Matrix here. But repetition is necessary to establish thoughts in the unconscious. Reason alone can't achieve that. We really have to deconstuct our mental make-up in order to free ourselves from its slavery. For truth often lies beyond the mind. And ignorance is a state of mind, and so is slavery.
For instance, in movies, especially in romantic love stories, they show lovers and villains. In the end, the hero defeats the villains and wins his love. But real-life love stories hardly have happy endings. I think this is because real love stories have real villains, and most of the villains are, again, internal and invisible, and therefore difficult to defeat. The real lovers are often caught unaware of the real villains. And the villain, which is lovers' own mind, and its brain-children - doubts and jealousy, possess and strangulate their love in front of their helpless eyes.
perhaps mind can be conquered by Will, because will is not fully ruled by mind. We can say that will is the mind of Nature. Love is also a form of will, an irrevocable decision taken by Nature. A strong-willed man, a hero, laughs at his mind and its doubts and fears. "Say what you want to. Speak as much as you can. But I will not stop loving her." May be the ceremonial fire represents nothing but this will. It is not impossible, since Hinduism is so full of symbolism.
3. The Fruits of Solitude: - What a man gathers in his solitude is what he gives in his company. My friend Sanket spends his time with his guitar when he is alone, and, as a result of that union, we get to hear those lovely, soothing tunes when we are with him. On the other hand someone who doesn't enjoy his solitude is often a boring companion. He has little imagination, and little loyalty to anything but his petty pleasures; his life revolves around the superficialities of sex and sensex, and consequently he has nothing of any worth to share with others.
At the same time, loneliness is a very personal and very real problem, which sometimes we forget and sometimes we endure. But no medicine can cure it. Like disease and death, loneliness is also an existential inevitability.
One way to alleviate the agony of loneliness is an occupying interest. Finally, everything sucks in life. Intensity is required for excellence; but when boredom is concerned, the take-away word is diversity. Have as many interests as possible. Don't worry about depth. We are anyways a shallow generation. People will neither notice nor mind.
Sometime back Religion was inextricably associated with Education. It is not so now. (It's another matter that now Market has taken over it. Greed has replaced Fear.) Morality, for many of us, is now based on the solid foundation of Reason and personal spirituality, and not on fear and superstition. Madarsa etc seems fossils of the bygone era, though they are still in existence. Similarly, there will be a day when people will laugh at the idea of religion and caste etc being the most important factors in matrimony.
When I say this, I want to make it very clear that I do recognize that marriage is primarily and ultimately a social institution. But that doesn't make it a religious ritual in which individuals have to be sacrificed at the altar of meaningless traditions.
Same holds true for caste. In connection with this topic, I have three points to make here.
First, culture and religion are not the same, as commonly supposed. Religious difference/similarity is not necessarily cultural difference/similarly. These two are two different things with nothing much in common.
Second, even the issue of cultural incompatibility must not be used as an excuse to curtail the freedom of adults. Modern times are all about more freedom and more responsibility for man and woman. Moreover, it is possible for two individuals from different religious and cultural backgrounds to strike a harmony at personal level, which transcends all these man-made barriers. It is for them to decide and it is for them to bear the consequences of their decisions. They have right to make a second best decision as well, as long as they don't harm others. Others must not poke their noses in their personal affairs.
Third, the real challenge is not ideological rigor-mortis or intellectual inertia, though nobody can ignore their presence around us, and the formidable frequency with which they present themselves to us. Reason has been made a mere agent of selfishness, a mere alibi to protect the status quo of the satisfied. The real challenge, which beats out the best of thinkers, is social pressure. And for financially and politically potent individuals, this pressure works at an emotional level - the mothers start crying and the fathers stop to talk. We usually succumb to it, and one more generation is sacrificed to perpetuate the traditional nonsense. How do we fight society in its ugliest restrictive form? We can not unless we understand it, and most of us can not. Who is society? How does it look like? Everyone swears by it and no one can see it or show it. But we have to see it, and also see how it works, in order to defeat it. To me, it's clear that this invisible system thrives on our collective ignorance and fear. And its only antithesis is truth and courage. Now can you see why society discourages both? :)
2. The villain inside: - Our mind is like a software that has been installed in our brain. This software has been designed (again, by society, and its powerful Agent Smiths) to control us and rule us through the maxims of the forgotten childhood memories, which primarily involves emotions like fear, guilt and shame. We see what is shown to us and we say what we hear from our surroundings. Original thinking is often a delusion. We think that we are thinking but we hardly ever do that. Doing 2 + 2 = 4 is no thinking. Excuse me for repeating The Matrix here. But repetition is necessary to establish thoughts in the unconscious. Reason alone can't achieve that. We really have to deconstuct our mental make-up in order to free ourselves from its slavery. For truth often lies beyond the mind. And ignorance is a state of mind, and so is slavery.
For instance, in movies, especially in romantic love stories, they show lovers and villains. In the end, the hero defeats the villains and wins his love. But real-life love stories hardly have happy endings. I think this is because real love stories have real villains, and most of the villains are, again, internal and invisible, and therefore difficult to defeat. The real lovers are often caught unaware of the real villains. And the villain, which is lovers' own mind, and its brain-children - doubts and jealousy, possess and strangulate their love in front of their helpless eyes.
perhaps mind can be conquered by Will, because will is not fully ruled by mind. We can say that will is the mind of Nature. Love is also a form of will, an irrevocable decision taken by Nature. A strong-willed man, a hero, laughs at his mind and its doubts and fears. "Say what you want to. Speak as much as you can. But I will not stop loving her." May be the ceremonial fire represents nothing but this will. It is not impossible, since Hinduism is so full of symbolism.
3. The Fruits of Solitude: - What a man gathers in his solitude is what he gives in his company. My friend Sanket spends his time with his guitar when he is alone, and, as a result of that union, we get to hear those lovely, soothing tunes when we are with him. On the other hand someone who doesn't enjoy his solitude is often a boring companion. He has little imagination, and little loyalty to anything but his petty pleasures; his life revolves around the superficialities of sex and sensex, and consequently he has nothing of any worth to share with others.
At the same time, loneliness is a very personal and very real problem, which sometimes we forget and sometimes we endure. But no medicine can cure it. Like disease and death, loneliness is also an existential inevitability.
One way to alleviate the agony of loneliness is an occupying interest. Finally, everything sucks in life. Intensity is required for excellence; but when boredom is concerned, the take-away word is diversity. Have as many interests as possible. Don't worry about depth. We are anyways a shallow generation. People will neither notice nor mind.
2 comments:
I would be able to appreciate your views more if you would also include your understanding of religion and culture in your piece. the way these words are accepted socially is, of course, incorrect, or i should say the understanding can be obfuscated. i mean, even concepts like nation and state are, to a large extant, cruelly abstract. especially in case of india...
culture has more to do with habits and customs than things like truth. that's why modern man doesn't want custom to interfere with education. religion is even worse. religion, as we know, serves to lull a man's curiosity. it has degenerated into a tool of power. and there are people who want things to be as they are. they can break people's heart, even their skulls, to conserve a system that keeps them powerful.
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